Wednesday, June 30, 2010

So today is not only a Hump Day....

But it's my new but dear, friend and fellow blogger's birthday! That's right, today is Tasha 's birthday. She will be turning 27 and she is not only an awesome blogger; you seriously need to follow her, LIKE ASAP! She is so kind and I just love her good spirit!

Go on and click on her
birthday post and please wish her a happy birthday!!!! Thank you!!!

Happy Birthday Tasha! I wish nothing but the best in life; I hope everything you've ever wished for do come true and you know, very soon, we'll accomplish that stellar backpacking trip across Europe. You name the date and I'm there ;)

I have been duped today.....

So this is going to be a very long post. I went to go to the supermarket today to grab a few things; *YAY FOR LEAN BONELESS CHICKEN BREASTS AND ORANGE JUICE* and I was standing in line, you know just minding my business when this random girl came up to me, asking me for the time. I was like "Okay, you know sometimes I randomly ask strangers for the time too"; whenever I don't my phone on me since I never wear a watch.

Then she started talking to me about how she looked awful the morning after a break-up; I told her she looked fine, and not because I was trying to be nice but because she did look fine. She didn't seem sad nor did it seem like she had been up all night crying her eyes out which is what I would look like the morning after a break-up.

At that point, I'm trying to just pay my things and get the fuck out of there because A) I was in dire need of sleep and B) I don't know this chick. As I was walking out of the supermarket, she broke down in tears, y'all! IN TEARS! So I'm literally standing besides a random chick that I don't even know who's bawling her eyes out and loudly, might I add, and everyone passing by is staring at me like I just beat the crap out of her.

As I'm not inhuman, I tried, awkwardly but nonetheless I tried, to give her a hug because whenever I'm sad, I just need hugs. We exchanged names and I told her that if she needed to talk to someone, she could talk to me. So we grabbed a mint diabolo, which is a drink I love. It's just some mint syrup mixed often with 7Up or lemonade and it's delicious. We went to a near-by park and that's when she told me her breakup story and it was just a bunch of hot mess. HOT MESS, I TELL YOU!

So after 5 years together, they finally split. Her guy is very family-oriented which is not an issue for some people but for her, she would have preferred that her man actually listens to her instead of always listening to his family. His family doesn't like her anymore; they used to but that was before she had wished that his father, who was sick and in the hospital at that point, would just die. She had said that out of anger but as she is shit out of luck, his father had died that same night. So now his family thinks she is a witch in disguise and has somehow, cast a spell on their family and they do not want him to ever be with her.

That family drama aside, she, then tells me that she caught her guy cheating on her with one of her friends about a week ago. As if that wasn't enough, he only calls her when he needs to get laid and obviously because she is IN LOVE with him, she goes to him and whenever he's done with her, he just throws her out of his apartment. He has also been known to hit her on multiple occasions, and get this! She is even questionning his sexuality since he does some shady things with some shady friends. Yet she is convinced that he loves her deeply because one day, they were fighting and she asked him if he had ever loved her or if he loves her now and if he doesn't, when is he planning on falling in love with her ?

His answer, ladies and gents {Are there gents around these parts ?} was:

" I didn't love you, I just really needed to get laid and you were there so. You know, on some level or you know, subconsciously, I love you. I'm sure I'll be head over heels with you very soon; you know you just can't push feelings like this. You need to give me time."

So he threw her the bone and like the little puppy he knew she was, she held on to that bone as if her life depended on it. I swear you guys, my hands were literally itching to just shake her and slap her just so she could finally wake up and smell the coffee. I was holding myself back so badly. I tried to point out to her that if he was pulling crap like this, then maybe he wasn't good for her and that she should try to move on because a guy like that, will only hurt her. She proceeded to find every single excuse in the book on why he was acting like such a douchebag.

I felt so bad for her; not because he did loads of crappy stuff to her and still she accepted, but because she didn't even know who she was anymore. She was so blindsided by this dude that she forgot who she was or on some level, she doesn't even know who she is to begin with.

She has been with him since she was a teen and at that point, I think she had lost her father so her bf sort of became the father figure in her life; meaning he always told her what to do, who to be friends with and what to like. And now that he was gone, she felt like she had lost all of her marks in life. She doesn't know what she wants to do with her life; she doesn't know what friends to hang out with; it's to the point where she doesn't even know what kind of drink she likes anymore.

I tried to cheer her up as much as I could and told her to seek some professional help because there isn't much that I could do except give her the sound and mostly SANE advice that I could formulate which is MOVE ON! Everyone in her immediate entourage has told her the same thing yet she is still lost. She thanked me for all my help and then proceeded to find another person sitting in the bench behind us, and she began crying in his arms and telling him the same story over again.

I was curious to find out if she would tell him the same story so I just sat there and pretended to be highly engrossed in my book while eavesdropping on their conversation. She told him about the same story as she told me but she fancied it up a little bit. She mentionned how she went to see 5 different psychics and how they all told her that this guy wasn't good for her but that she would meet her prince charming in a park at a point in her life where she was facing an obstacle. At this point, I was astonished because this girl is stooping to all kinds of low to have people feel sympathy for her. She then asked him to take pity on her and buy her something to eat because she hasn't eaten in days; he asked her if he wanted to get kebabs with her and she had gladly accepted.

I followed them because they were heading towards my place so I thought I could kill two birds with one stone; so he had bought her the kebab and bid her good day since he had to go to his driving course. She saw me and asked me for a ciggie; I told her I didn't smoke. She then sat at the pub right by my place and fell on this old fella and she did her little number again. I mean the whole works; the crying, the breakup story. He bought her two vodka shots, a coke and a full plate of Greek food.

In a matter of hours, this girl had gotten two drinks, two shots, and two full meals. That's when I realised I had been taken for a ride you guys; this was her daily job, I think. I felt like such a fool for falling for her BS but then again, I can't be angry because at least I tried to help out someone no matter what.

That was my eventful day! How was yours? Anything crazy like this ever happened to you?

Monday, June 28, 2010

Converses vs. High Heels: Where do I fit in?

Disclaimer: Some of these pictures might make you want to run for the hills but I am confident enough to share this with y'all.

Growing up, I went through many different phases in my life. When I was about as high as 3 apples, the youngest of my mom's family, my lovely aunt was a teen. A teen who was loud, bubbly who had mistaken me for her real-life Barbie Doll. She used to come to our house with all of her friends and they would dress me up, in big poofy dresses and do little braids on my hair. I didn't mind. I loved being a little diva; I would tell most people not to touch me because I was pretty and they were not.
You could say that I was very conceited; when you're an only child and everyone in your family tells you how special and cute you are, you tend to believe it, right? RIGHT?

I know- I was a cutester!

here I am with my father

Then I became a teen. A teen who loved her baggy jeans and her holey sweatshirts more than life itself. I had over 20 pairs of jeans and I wore them non-stop. I didn't want anything to do with hair styling, make-up or anything of the sort. It's like my aunt and her crazy friends had traumatized me to death. My mother would often be quoted, saying: " I gave birth to a girl, not a boy. Please put on a skirt, or a top that doesn't reach your knees." I was seriously set on wearing a purple and black tracksuit to my senior prom.

To scare my mother even more, I used to tell her that I would rock a white Adidas tracksuit with "The Bride" bedazzled on the back and I would match them with some fierce Converse white high tops; she had so many nightmares about it. Point was that I didn't care one bit. In high school, I hung out with my little group of girlfriends who are still my best friends now, whom I miss dearly by the way :) and I didn't participate heavily in after-school activities. I wasn't on any sports team, I didn't do arts or crafts, I wasn't member of any club. I was just plain.

When I was going into my senior year of high school, I had a wake up call; I wasn't going to be remembered for anything so I kicked myself into gear. I became a member of the music club; it didn't matter that I couldn't play a single instrument. I joined the school "glee club" if you could call it that; it didn't matter that I cannot hold a tune to save my life. I was part of the drama club and even co-wrote a play with all of my classmates; I played an OG {that's an Original Gangsta}. I was part of the Arts and Fashion show where I was behind the scenes of course; you can't expect a miracle to happen.

I started dressing up and changing a bit my style. I still loved my converses but I'd wear tighter jeans and cute tops. I even wore a dress .:GASP:. to my prom. Then I did a complete 180°. I tried being a complete girly girl; I wore dresses and skirts non-stop. I would buy loads and loads of make-up that I didn't even know how to wear often. I started buying heels that I couldn't even walk in; I guess I just wanted to be noticed as a girl for the first time in my life.

at Prom

Now it feels like the old part of me wants to break out from the shell; I don't want to veer off into the horrible part of me but I can't pretend to be girly girly because that's just not who I am. If a girl can walk in 4' inch heels and not have sore feet by the end of the night, then she's my hero. My feet are already sore from wearing flats all day. I do love makeup and have gotten better at it, most definitely but sometimes, I just like to be bare. I know I have sun spots and little freckles around my nose but I embrace it; it's who I am. I don't need to hide behind all these artificial stuff because that's what I was doing, hiding. I hid behind everything instead of really feeling things and just being myself.

I am not a spotlight kind of girl; I like to blend in. But there is a difference between blending in and completely disappearing. Now, I am at a point where I just want to find a common ground between my converses and my high heels.

+ =

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Total ramblings....

Hello lovelies; I hope you guys are having a wonderful start to the weekend. I am currently sick in bed; drinking nothing but garlic tea; sounds awful right? But, it's a grandma's recipe and it supposed to soothe your throat. So far, it's helping.

Can somebody explain to me how it can be nearly 30° degrees outside yet I have a cold? This weather is seriously messing with me. It's supposed to be really hot for the next few days and I just hope I can feel better bery bery soon.

This might sound reallly really sappy but I just wanted to take the time to say "thank you so much" to all my followers; thank you for sticking up with me and all the big, messy randomness that I am and mostly for taking the time to comment on my blog; it means more than you know. I could, honest to the big man upstairs, check ALOT of these boxes and the weird/funny thing is, I barely, if not, not really know you guys at all except for a handful of you.

In fact I will.

Don't mind the crappy handwriting. I'm not good with a computer.

I try to be really consistent with this whole blogging thing and I must say I'm really loving doing this. I have lost a few subscribers over the past week or so and seriously, it's not to be mean or disrespectful, but SCREW THEM! I write for myself and you guys who follow me along on this crazy, sometimes random journey. I, personnally don't follow someone just to bring my followers rate up; if I like a blog, I will follow because I thoroughly enjoy reading about other people's lives and have a deep interest in whatever they have to say. I just feel like sometimes, people do that with my blog and it's driving me nuts.

So if you're reading this and plan to follow me to bring your rate up, just to unfollow me later on, please save your time and don't click on that Follow button. THANKS! I know some of you are old followers and some of you are new; to all my new followers, welcome, thanks for stopping by and I really hope you stick around.

Anywho, that has been said. I've been thinking about this for a few days and sometimes, I say things too quickly without thinking rationally so I felt that if this issue was still bothering me after a couple of days, then I would adress it and seriously, I am SOOOOOO glad I did.

In other news, since I'm stuck in bed, let's dream *together, please* of everything I wish I could do.

I don't know if it's the mood I'm in, but I would love to just be completely outrageous with fashion like M.I.A. This girl doesn't follow any kind of rules and I think, once in awhile, this could be totally liberating.

I wish I could dip my toes in the ocean; feel the waves crash against my skin.

I wish someone could feel this way about me.

I wish I could go to a club and listen to this song on repeat.

I wish I could ride a bike through all the little fields in France and look effortlessly glamourous while doing so.

Have a great weekend you guys and if you're doing lots and lots of crazy stuff (i.e, partying), keep me in your toughts.

Friday, June 25, 2010

Favorite Fridays!

As one of Jen's new followers, I had no idea she had such ingenious ideas like Favorite Fridays. I think I will enjoy doing these little series weekly. This week it is all about celebrity couples who did not make it; now I can't just choose one. If you feel like playing along, go check out Jen's blog. Go on, DO IT! What are you still doing HERE???

Well first, read my answers though :).

I could talk days on end about Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston and I felt such deep, profound pain for Jen {and yes, I am on a first name basis with any of the actors on Friends.} when I found out that Brad had dumped for Saint Angelina; while Brennifer were the EPITOME of the Hollywood power couple, I think so many others existed and it is my duty, nay, my mission to bring some other lovely couples to your attention. But first, please dry your eyes as you see this:

RIP to the cutest couple EVER! I don't care what anybody says.

Now, let's talk about a couple that fell in love on a movie set, as they all mostly DO. Brangelina, anyone?

They're both Canadian and they starred in one of the biggest romantic movies to date; they had so much chemistry that it was impossible for all of us to ignore the love that was oozing out of both of them.

Recognize who I am talking about? No? Not Yet? What if I would say that both of the names start with an R?

If you guessed Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams, go ahead and do your happy dance because you are COOOOORRRREEEECCCT! The Notebook still makes me cry to this day and I was so sad the day they broke up. I know you were too, deep, deep down :).

Here's one of the things Ryan has said about the breakup:

"God bless 'The Notebook.' I am still grateful for being introduced to one of the great loves of my life. But people do Rachel and me a disservice by assuming we were anything like the people in that movie. Rachel and my love story is a hell of a lot more romantic than that."

Isn't that sweet? Sadly,they broke up because of their hectic schedules and secretely I am hoping that they get back together. To reminisce about them, please enjoy these next pictures.

My ABSOLUTE favorite.

My next and LAST couple met at her birthday party in 1997. The first thing she said to him was, "I think you're my birthday present." Quite flirty, the little lady. They dated for a while and got married in 1999 following the release of their blockbuster hit. They were married for 10 years and got divorced, SADLY. They have two children together.

Come on now, you know I am talking about Ryan Phillippe and Reese Witherspoon. They were adorbz {ADORABLE} together and I shall miss them together very much although there have been rumours that Ryan had cheated on her and if he did, then it's a good thing she kicked his @$$ to the curb. But just for old time's sake, let's take a trip down memory lane.

Those were my favorite celebrity couples who sadly didn't make it. Yeah, I did think twice about Justin and Britney before she went LOCO and then got her act together and now, I hear she just may be trying to fall off the good girl wagon AGAIN; Rihanna and Chris Brown, although he was a little BITCH who couldn't control his anger and probably did THE WORST THING EVER to his career, I do admit that they were cute together and the third one I would have chosen would have been the CW sweethearts Chad Michael Murray and Sophia Bush; so darn cute!

What is your favorite celebrity couple who didn't make it ?

Notice my couples all start with an R? Maybe it's because I love the name Ryan!

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Guess who's Pearly?

Don't guess too hard now :); I am!!!!

I am featured on Jen's blog today!!

I had completely forgotten about being a Pearly Blogger because of my crappy mood but this is wonderful news. This might just be able to turn my frown TOTALLY upside down.

You can check it out here and here and also here and don't forget to click on here!

P.S: Did I mention you could check it out here?


Today ain't just a good day...

I could be in a good mood today considering the warm weather we've been having here in France and all the fun cool things I could do considering but I ain't.

I felt cranky from the moment I went to bed and I'm still cranky hours after I woke up. These hormones have been playing such a huge trick on me; I've been going back and forth between laughing hysterically and crying as if my mother had just died.

Guess today is just a day where me and Mr. Bed need some lovin' time.

Good day to all!

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Did you know?

Hello friends!

I hope y'all had a good weekend and a good start to the week.

For my part, Aunt Flow came to town; now I know that may be TMI but hey whatever, it's my blog I can write whatever I want :). So I have been trying to go running but I feel so weak and with my cramps, I didn't feel like exercising too much.

In order to compensate, I did loads of crunches and pushups; GIRLY PUSHUPS because I cannot do the regular one.

Except that I really don't look like that when I do my pushups.

And I have been walking ALOT! Like at least 3 hours a day. It should compensate right? RIGHT?

Ok, let's just pretend it does. I went to the farmer's market on Monday and I picked up some magazines for 50 cents; I'm a magazine junkie and for 50 cents rather than 4 euros for the same amount of magazines, I say Farmer's Market all the way. I also picked up a loose powder and some jewelry because I tend to shine ALOT during the summer. I will post about that soon.

My skin is weird; during the winter, it gets so dry and the summer, it gets so oily. I have been having a lot of breakouts lately and I feel like I shouldn't even be stepping outside. I have a few 4 MAYJAH breakouts on both sides of my cheeks and a little tree tea oil and Menthol Colgate goes a long way. After just one night of application, it reduced by half my breakouts.

I have been doing good on at least, one of my New Year's resolution; I had to stop chewing my nails. And I have been doing so bad earlier in the year but for the past month or so, I have been letting them grow and I feel like a proud mama!

Today, I went for a stroll and I found this little park near the train station. I sat in the grass and read a few chapters of The other Boleyn Girl. I have seen the movie but reading the book is so much better. It felt good to just be outside but then my eyes started getting red because I'm allergic to pollen. YUCK!

I'm not trying to be all gangsta- My red eyes are so bad, it looks like I'm high.
I look so TAN!

In other news, I have this weird obsession. I have a thing for funny laws. I can spend hours and hours reading some crazy ones and I thought I could share a few of them with you guys.

* Until 2002, Brazilian men were allowed to "return" their brides if they were not virgins.

* In Pittsburgh, Pensylvannia, it is a CRIME to sweep dirt under your rug.

* In Thailand, you must pay a fine of $600 in Thailand if you’re caught throwing away chewed bubble gum on the sidewalk.

* In Canada, when raining, a person may not water his/her lawn.

* It is illegal to kiss on railways in France.

* In South Africa, a license is required to purchase a television set.

* In Tibet, monks need the government's permission to reincarnate.

* In New York, citizens may not greet each other by "putting one's thumb to the nose and wiggling their fingers."

* In Chico, California, bowling is illegal on the sidewalk.

* In Florida, it is illegal to sell your children.

* In L.A, you can't wash two babies at once.

Those are some of my favorites! Do you have any crazy laws near where you live?

Sunday, June 20, 2010

A different kind of a Father's Day...

Today is Father's Day. I've been reading a lot of people's posts about how great their father was, is and always will be and I'm super happy for them. Yet, I don't know how to feel.

I should be happy that I have a step-father who cares about me and who treats me like his own daughter and in a way I am but I cannot help but think about my father at this point.

When I was young, my father was my hero. He meant the world and beyond to me. I was his little princess and he did everything he could to take care of me while my mother was getting some treatments for her diabetes in Europe.

When I was 2 or 3, I sustained a serious injury that led to a 3rd degree burn on my left leg. There was nobody to look after me and I was a snarky little one so I went into the kitchen and put my leg in some hot oil that just came off the stovetop that was left on the floor. {Sorry for the gory deets.} I don't remember any of it, thankfully but right after my incident, my maternal grandfather lost his life. My family called my mother and she was on the first flight back home. After my grandpa's funeral, my mother came to find an injured daughter. She decided right there and then, that my father wasn't able to take care of me and she left me with my aunt and my grandmother.

After that, I only saw my father on Fridays. In Djibouti, our weekends was only on Fridays. So every Friday, he used to pick me up and we went to go get ice creams and just hang out. Sometimes, he dropped by on weekdays but Fridays was usually our days. And that was our deal when my mother was abroad and she was abroad ALOT. When she was home, I had a regular lifestyle. I slept in my own bed and had my own little dolls. And that was my life until I was about 9.

When I was 9, my parents decided AT FIRST, to move out to Canada in order to rekindle their marriage. My mother and I went before my dad since he had to sell our home and everything else. After a year passed my father never showed up. He preferred to stay back home with his family and he chose to lead a different lifestyle. He chose to become polygamous. So my mother divorced him.

To say that I was hurt by all of this is the least I can come up with. I was destroyed; I was pained. I was so resentful. I was angry. I was so angry at my mother for years instead of being angry at him. I didn't talk to him for years. For 8 years, I only heard of him when his father died {RIP} and on 2 birthdays; if you can even count them as birthdays. I'm born in december and he would call me in April. I'd turn 20 and he thought I was turning 16.

I kinda reconnected with him when I went back to Djibouti in 2006; but he had already spewed his venom. He told his side of the family that he has been taking care of me financially even though he didn't send me one dime in 8 years. To think he's been fooling his WHOLE family hurt me because they thought I was an ungrateful child who didn't care to come visit her dad or his family. I didn't care that he lied to them; I just cared that he lied about me. That's when I realised something. My dad was a complete stranger to me. At that same time, my mom FINALLY:) got remarried to this wonderful man that became my step-father.

To this day, my dad and I talk rarely. We spend 2 years not talking and then he'll pop back for a few months and try to control my life because he thinks he's intitled to it then he'll walk from my life again. On this father's day, I think about what my dad has taught me?

He didn't teach me how to ride a bike; I don't know how to ride a bike. He didn't teach me how to read; he didn't teach me right from wrong; he didn't teach me how to drive. He didn't teach me about boys. He didn't teach me how to love properly. He didn't teach me that family is essential and should be always cherished. All I know and mostly who I am, my mother taught me to the best of her abilities. So this father's day, I am not thinking about my birth father. I want to celebrate my mother and my step-dad.

My step-dad who, in a matter of a couple of years, managed to give me all the love and affection I've ever wanted when it was so easy to not recognize me as his daughter. He could've easily hated me and didn't want to care about me but he chose not to. It's stellar how this ONE man managed to bring bliss and happiness to my mother and I; my mother and I were on shaky grounds before he came in and made us a real family.

Sure he didn't hold my hand when I was scared; he didn't teach me how to read or to ride a bike; but what he taught me is worth much more than everything my birth father ever did for me. He taught me how to trust in men; that all men are not dogs who are out to hurt us. He taught me that true love exists even at 50 years old; he taught me that some people care. He taught me that family means more than wealth; he taught me that and so much more.

If there is one thing I am grateful for on this Father's Day, is to have him in my life. To know that no matter what, he'll always be there for me and he'll love me unconditionally. For years, I asked myself why did God put me and my mother through that hell; now I'm sure that in the end, my step-dad was our silver lining. And I love him so much for that.

"A father is not the one who made you; he is the one who teaches you how to be YOU."

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