Friday, July 16, 2010

Day 3: Letter to your parents

{Part of the 30-day Challenge}

Dear dad birth father,

I thank you for loving me and caring for me for the first 10 years of my life; for that I will be eternally grateful. You know what you did to my mother and all this time, instead of hating you, I hated her. Instead of blaming you, I blamed her and I can never forgive myself for that.

When you blatantly abandoned us, and please do not get upset AGAIN over the word abandoned because I mean, let's call a spade a spade; you abandoned us. So when you abandoned us, my whole world crashed. I felt like a piece of me had died; it's like someone had stabbed, cut me open, took a part of my heart and left me open. I couldn't think of a reason why in the world, would you give up on your family? What could be more important than spending the rest of your life with the woman whom you promised a life together to and your adorable little girl who loved you so much? My only guess is that you were seriously blind but now it's your loss.

You broke a good woman's heart and made her so cold that she didn't consider being close to another man for years; you missed out on all your daughter's love and affection. You missed out on birthdays, special occasions, holidays, and everything in between. You missed out on us.

Now, you try to come back into our lives as if none of it ever happened, but news flash it did. I hope that you can read all the anger and the hurt in my letter because I am that angry. I have been angry for longer than I can remember and I realise now, that God had a different plan for us. You were chosen to follow your path and us, ours. Somehow, this has made us stronger. My mother finally found a man who loves her more than life itself and I found peace at last; I found peace within a recomposed family. I have a mother who always wants my best and a step-dad who loves me like his own daughter; what more could I ask for?

As I said, I respect you for the first 10 years of my life but please do not expect more from me for I will not be able to give it to you. You can't expect to pop whenever you want in and out of my life and try to control any aspect of it. You surrendered your rights to any part of my life the day you chose to give up on us. I hope you live a wonderful life with your wives and your children. I wish you nothing but the best and as of right now, I'm officially letting go.

Your daughter.

P.S: If you could please take off my mom's pictures off your wall, that'd be great. It is getting kinda creepy. I'm just saying.


  1. Again, I can relate it's scary. And again I'm proud of you and what you've expressed in your letter.

    I already know how I plan on writing mine. But that letter is for another day - the one about someone who has hurt you.

    Good for you!!! =)

  2. You and I have so much in common it is scary. But I hope it really heals some of your wounds because it has been helpful for me. I have gotten my mom's situation off my chest and I feel so much better now.


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