Hiya! :) I am a regular 20-something who's just trying to find herself. In my many aspects of my personnality, I try to be so much of what I want to be; a friend, a writer, a poet and a lover of all things pretty. I try to live as much as I can; to love as hard as I can and to just go with whatever God has in store for me. Life is sometimes crazy and quite unexpected and that's the beauty of it; trying to control all aspects of my life really made me lose my grip. And in order to learn, I have to let go. So letting go I am.
"We all live with the objective of being happy; our lives are
different and yet the same."-Anne Frank
I spent most of my day, today in bed, being sick as a dog. When I get sick, I lose hope; hope that everything will be all right. Every little bad thing that ever happened to me flows back to my mind faster than water flowing out of a fountain. I lose my essence, I lose who I am because everything did not go as I had previously planned it. I just thought to myself,"Why me, God?. Why me? What did I do wrong in my life, to deserve this? Why are you punishing me like this?"Then as if it was a sign from God, this little glimmer of light just appeared through the blinds of my window, drawing a long straight line on my bare wall. I looked through my window and the sky was covered with clouds; clouds gray as gray could get and through those clouds, lo and behold, I saw a glimpse of the sun. Ace of Base came straight to mind as I got up and pulled up my blinds. I found myself singing as loudly as I could while making my bed. I found myself shuffling my feet to the beat in my heart while I gathered my room up. I found myself smiling while trying to catch a rerun of Friends. That's when I realised that God has given me another chance to change my outlook today. For the life of me, I couldn't remember why I was so hopeless a few moments ago. I couldn't gather all the negative thoughts in my head because there were none. I felt cheery, bright and loving; my cold had suddenly disappeared.
God works in mysterious ways and he taught me so many valuable lessons today. I learnt that nothing can bring you down when you have faith; that you make your own happiness and that your past does not define who you are today. I've made a lot mistakes in my life and I've regretted it; but now I see that instead of regretting it happened, I should be glad because I get to learn from my mistakes. As I sat on my bed, watching the sun go down this evening, I felt this pure sense of serenity, that everything would be allright. Now, nothing and no one can take away my faith.